seaoftroubles | The New Girl preplay

Directly off the end of last episode! Jordan decides to murder Nathan since Audrey isn't Audrey. There's a fight and lots of running and shouting. Eventually Lexi fires into the air to get everyone to stop. Duke says he can maybe clear things up if he talks to Vince, and gets Vince to agree to not kill Nathan right away so they can make Lexi fall in love with him and kill him instead.

So basically, DUKE STALLS LIKE WOAH

Vince decides the best way to get Lexi in love with Nathan is to have her tag along on a trouble investigation like Audrey did. They head out to a case where a kid flipped his lid and tried to kill his girlfriend on a date, only to end up locked in a freezer. Nathan, Lexi, and Duke go to face him down, and see him end up slitting his own throat.

Duke ends up leading the questioning of the kid's girlfriend, because Nathan is being all strong silent type. Signs point to a hospitalized kid named Tyler being involved, he's in the hospital because he was paralyzed in a big car accident both the victim and his girlfriend were also in. Lexi just wants food. Duke is all "Nathan, come on, I know you have no game BUT THIS IS THE WOMAN YOU LOVE. SORT OF."

Duke and Nathan question Tyler while Lexi goes to get a CT scan. Tyler says that he felt like he was out of control when Katie looked at him, like she's troubled. Nathan gives the kid his card, and then Duke gives him a little "prescription" for free drinks at the Gull.

Meanwhile, Katie throws herself in front of a car. Fun!

Duke gets Jennifer to go home for awhile. If anyone goes with her, they may get to see Jordan hit on Wade. If not . . . that'll just happen off screen. I'm guessing Luce and Tavi will be stuck to Duke for most of this?

Lexi says maybe it's Tyler because Josh and Katie were clearly getting it on behind his back. They all go back to the hospital, but find a dead orderly instead of Tyler. Duke goes to find a nurse -- this is where he gets possessed, and possibly where we start to go our own way because he has actual loved ones around who worry about him in our version.

Tyler-in-Duke sidetracks Lexi and Nathan and locks them in a walk in cooler. He tries to dodge Luce and Tavi too. I'm guessing it doesn't work well.

Perhaps they take him back to the Gull? He manages to get a minute alone with Wade to get the idea to kill his own body so he can stay in Duke's. He manages to get away from Luce and Tavi somehow and heads for the hospital, possibly with a very confused Jennifer in tow.

Lexi (and probably immune Lucifer?) heads in to deal with Tyler and keep him from murdering anyone, only to at the last minute "chicken out" and let Tyler try to kill his own body. This sets off Duke's trouble, which override's Tyler's trouble, saving Duke from the possession. Hurray!

Duke manages to pull Lexi aside at the Gull to point out that Audrey totally would have known what would have happened, and she admits to only pretending to be Lexi. Show ends here. Pretty sure Duke will want to stick around to try to clear things up/get rid of Wade, and this is where Lucifer and Octavia DRAG HIM BODILY HOME IF NECESSARY.

And then it's all over but the moody moody aftermath, mmmmmm

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

From:

seaoftroubles

The climax! Lexi, supposedly not knowing about Duke's trouble, decides to let Tyler off himself. I feel like Lucifer might need sidetracking here somehow, since he would be very likely to spill the beans on Duke's trouble? Or maybe he just gets hung up on the "EXCUSE YOU DO NOT MAKE MY BOYFRIEND'S BODY KILL ANYONE ARE YOU KIDDING HE'S ENOGUH OF A MESS AS IT IS" or something and not get around to mentioning it.

From:

seaoftroubles

"Uhhh," Jennifer said, looking up as Tyler pulled her rented SUV into the hospital parking lot. "What are we doing at the hospital? Do you need a distraction? Should I flash my boobs?"

Duke should have had a similarly silly one-liner to throw back at her, she knew him well enough to know that by now. This person -- not-Duke -- looked at her like she'd said something insane.

". . . Okay." He looked away, tugging something from his pocket. Jennifer realized with a start that he was armed.

Which, okay, the time for stalling and playing along was over. She really hoped that someone -- Octavia, preferably -- showed up as the cavalry soon, but in the meantime, it was Jennifer Mason, cub reporter to the rescue!

"What's wrong, babe?" The not-Duke guy asked.

"Babe," Jennifer echoed. "You know, I knew you were acting off. I thought maybe you were still a little drunk or something. But now . . . I'd swear you were hit by a trouble."

The man started to turn on her and she snatched her pen out of the SUV's center console and slammed it full force into his leg. He dropped his gun with a wail -- ha! Take that, dickbag! -- and she snatched it up even as she threw herself out of the car.

"I don't know who you really are, but I will shoot you, and I'll probably accidentally hit you in the face, so don't come near me!"

Tyler stared at the crazy lady -- why was it always the hot ones? because she's right, you're a bag of dicks -- and shook his head, throwing himself into a limping run towards the basement entrance, where he'd stashed his body.

Forget her. Forget those other jackasses in the vault. Forget fancy pants and his creepy eyes. Tyler was going to off his body, and then they could just get to mourning this Duke asshole and he could move on with his life.

From:

my_own_advocate

Octavia had sent Lucifer off to go find Duke the second she was in the capable hands of a medic. Then there had been texts, and now--

(nonono)

And now Lucifer was heading outside of the hospital as fast as he possibly could, barely biting down the urge to call for Duke (what point would there be to that?) or anyone else. This might be their last chance to find him, for all he knew.

(Nononononononononono.)

From:

seaoftroubles

"Oh thank god!" Jennifer cried, as Lucifer made it outside. "Duke just went inside, but it wasn't Duke!"

As she spoke, a distinctive blue Bronco pulled into the lot, and Nathan and Lexie hopped out.

"Wade just called," Nathan said, with the low intensity that only Duke and Audrey recognized as his upset voice. "He said Tyler thinks if he kills his actual body, he can stay in Duke's permanently."

From:

my_own_advocate

"That little weasely bastard is certainly not going to commit Grand Theft Duke for good," Lucifer snarled as his gaze skipped from Jennifer to Nathan.

Oh, good. There was his anger. Anger was easier to deal with than terror.

"So let's get in there and get him out, shall we?"

He adjusted his jacket sleeve, his eye twitching as he turned back towards the hospital.

From:

seaoftroubles

"You didn't give Duke anything, did you?" Nathan asked Jennifer. "Something he could take in to Tyler's body?"

Jennifer shook her head. "I, uh. Left my pen in his leg?"

Nathan took a deep breath, clearly not liking that answer. "So he could take control of you, too. Of any of us."

From:

my_own_advocate

"Speak for yourself," Lucifer said flatly.

And then he took off. He was no longer in the mood to stand around and strategize, and--

"Which way did he go?!"

That would probably be relevant.

From:

seaoftroubles

Lexie sucked on her teeth with a smirk. "Points for effort there, though."

"Wait, isn't Lexie immune, though?" Jennifer asked. "Like Audrey?"

"Okay." Lexie nodded. "I getcha. That's why I'm so important around here, huh? Alright, I'll go with Wings here, then."

"No," Nathan said quickly. "Not alone."

"Relax. I'm immune and he wants his boy back. We go in there, I grab the ticket out of this Tyler kid's hand, we get Duke back." Her smile grew. "And I get a free drink." She headed for Lucifer. "Come on, flyboy, I was listening to the police scanner in that ugly truck. I know where we'll probably find them."

From:

my_own_advocate

"I hope you're more certain than maybe," Lucifer huffed, because again-- it was better than simmering in his terror instead.

From:

seaoftroubles

"Relax, this place isn't that big. We'll find 'em."

Lexie led the way into the hospital and immediately found a stairwell heading down.

Like she knew this hospital pretty well.

It didn't take long for them to find a dark hallway filled with the plastic sheeting that indicated construction and renovation. And in that hallway, a gurney, on which an unconscious, heavy set young man lay, clutching a piece of paper. Lexie started for him -- and froze when a voice came out of the dark.

"You'll be dead before you ever get that thing out of my hand."

From:

my_own_advocate

"Big words for someone who couldn't kill Octavia or me the only chance he'll ever get," Lucifer growled.

From:

betterthanaplan

"You again," Tyler muttered. "What, this guy Duke your favorite rent boy or something?"

"You really think by killing yourself, you'll be left in control of Duke's body?" Lexie asked. "Well, what if it doesn't work?"

"What choice do I have?!" Tyler asked. "My body is ruined!" He pressed the ax head against his cheek. "There's no going back for me now. Maybe not for you two, either. How well do you know this guy? Is he worth dying for?"

Lexie swallowed, eyes flicking from the ax to Tyler's face, to the body on the gurney. Then to Lucifer.

They stayed on Lucifer just a beat longer than they probably should have for someone who didn't really know anything about him. Or for someone who didn't know anything about his boyfriend.

Long enough to -- maybe -- be asking him to trust her.

From:

my_own_advocate

He didn't know her. Why on Earth would he trust her?

"That's my boyfriend you're trying to make off with, you reckless little dullard," Lucifer said, a fire back in his eyes, even if they hadn't quite turned red. "You really think I'm going to let you do anything that might endanger his life and ownership of that body?"

From:

betterthanaplan

Dammit, Lucifer.

Tyler blinked at that, frowning faintly. Duke had been quiet for ages now, since around when the chick had stabbed him in the leg. Why the hell was he piping up now?

He smirked, though. "You know . . . Duke's in here with me," he said, rubbing his cheek on the ax head again, his eyes wide. "Listening, occasionally adding color commentary. . . . And even he thinks this is a good plan."

Lexie made a faint gagging noise. "I -- I can't -- I'm sorry." She shrank back towards the doorway.

From:

my_own_advocate

"Well, then perhaps he can also tell you I don't take kindly to people lying to me," Lucifer retorted. He took a step back, towards the fool's body, his eyes still on not-Duke, and not on the woman who allegedly looked like Audrey Parker.

If she wanted to go, so be it.

From:

betterthanaplan

he doesn't like liars. It's part of why I love him. Duke's voice had grown small. Dull. Resigned.

"Aww," Tyler said. "Aren't you two sweet."

Then he lunged forward, plunging the ax into his original body's chest.

From:

my_own_advocate

"No!"

Tyler lunged.

Lucifer lunged. For the axe? For the paper? Either?

It was equally fruitless.

Nonononononononononononono--

From:

betterthanaplan

Blood splattered across Tyler's face. Duke's face. It sat only for a moment before soaking in.

Duke had learned to control this reaction, to the point where little more than his hands shook. Tyler was entirely unprepared.

He reared back up, arms and hands cramping and contracting, as his eyes turned bright silver. His whole body shook as though in the grip of some sort of standing grand mal seizure.

"Wh-what's happening to m-me?!"

From:

my_own_advocate

"Duke's trouble," Lucifer said.

Quiet.

Would it erase Tyler? Or trap Duke inside his own body forever? The terror finally took hold over the anger, and he stared at Duke's body with wide, scared eyes.

Please be okay.

From:

betterthanaplan

"Duke's what." Lexie said. She was still huddled in the corner.

"I-I can't control it," Tyler cried. He tried to yank away from his dying body, and stumbled into the wall, back arching. His throat spasmed, forcing out a few more strangled cries, and then he collapsed to the floor.

". . . Tyler?" Lexie asked in a small voice.

From:

my_own_advocate

"Duke?" Lucifer asked simultaneously, louder, as he scrambled to get to the man's body. "Duke! Nononononono Duke..."

From:

betterthanaplan

"Relax, babe," Duke said, soft and rough. He reached for Lucifer in return. "It's me."

"Oh god," Lexie said, moving back to give the two of them space.

From:

my_own_advocate

In a minute, Lucifer would have a sly, punny retort for that particular phrase, but right now he had none. Just a loud, unsteady gasp, and his hand on Duke's cheek, leaning into him. Searching his face to make sure.

From:

betterthanaplan

"It's me," Duke said again. "It's me, it's me. Skaifaya, I'm okay."

Well, there was still a pen in his leg, and he hadn't even come close to even realizing all the things he was going to need to process after all this. But other than that.

"Was it true?" Lexie asked. "Were you really -- were you there, the whole time?"

Duke looked up at her, swallowing, and nodded. "It was like I was a fly on my own wall."

From:

my_own_advocate

Torture, was what that sounded like. "I'm sorry," Lucifer said, because-- because maybe if he hadn't run off over a dumb stalling plan then Duke wouldn't have--

He lifted Duke up off the floor, just because he could.